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Most interpersonal relationships are enacted face-to-face, but some are done at a distance with the use of certain information technology (IT) gadgets like cellular phones and computers, to mention a few. Such is the case of long-distance relationships (LDRs). The literature does not specify a specific physical distance to demarcate the point where a relationship becomes long-distance. Instead, scholars (e.g., Jurkane-Hobein, 2015; Stafford, 2005) stress that it is the couple who decide whether they are in an LDR or not. Typically, it is the restricted face-to-face communication that makes a couple label their relationship as long-distance.
Filipinos are not new to being in LDRs. Due to the Philippines’s mountainous terrain and archipelagic geography, many relationships were long-distance even during precolonial times. The physical distance between two villages may be short, but a mountain standing between them makes face-to-face interaction minimal. The same can be said for island-settlements separated by the sea. Considering that there were no electronic means of communication back then, people had to be in each other’s physical presence to communicate.
Today, LDRs are exemplified by Overseas Filipino Workers (OFWs) and their loved ones. They are not only physically apart, but there are also barriers to their communication. These migrant workers are widely considered in the Philippines as modern heroes because of their contribution to the country’s economy (Bhatia, 2013; Prudencio, 2007). Proclamation No. 276 signed in 1988 by then-President Corazon C. Aquino marked December as the “Month of Overseas Filipinos.” In 2016, OFW remittances reached a record $26.9 billion (De Vera, 2017). This is 5 percent higher than the $25.61 billion remitted the previous year. In that same year, OFWs’ contribution to the economy was 9.8 percent of the gross domestic product.
In 2016, there were 2.2 million Filipinos working abroad (Philippine Statistics Authority, 2017). They sent substantial amounts of money back home because their primary reason for leaving the Philippines was to provide for their families. Unemployment and low wages drive Filipinos to work abroad despite stricter immigration policies in host countries (Jaymalin, 2015). Cases of migrant workers being abused have not stopped OFWs from working overseas.
Although working abroad has allowed OFWs to provide for the financial needs of their families, there are also negative consequences. These include detrimental impacts on marital relationships, children’s behaviors, mental health, spirituality, traditional family roles, parental care, health, and moral values—the so-called “social costs” of labor migration (Arellano-Carandang, Solis, and Carandang, 2007; Edillon, 2008; Parreñas, 2001, 2005). However, these negative impacts can be partly addressed by proper communication using IT (Arellano-Carandang, Solis, & Carandang; Caasi, 2014; Edillon, 2008; Fresnoza-Flot, 2009; Madianou, 2006; Madianou & Miller, 2012a; Miyasaka, 2009, Uy-Tioco, 2004). Regular and frequent communication between OFWs and their families left behind reinforces emotional ties. It also allows parents to fulfill parental duties despite the distance, with many older fathers and mothers choosing to learn how to use the computer so that they can communicate online.
Modern communication technologies have been a big help because they have made long-distance interaction cheaper and easier (Pertierra, 2008). Interaction using these technologies is called computer-mediated communication (CMC). The most common CMC devices are Internet-enabled computers and mobile phones, with smartphones driving the growth of Internet use (Subido, 2017). Filipinos have taken very well to these gadgets, which they use to access the Internet. As of June 30, 2017, the Philippines was ranked 14th among countries with the highest number of Internet users (“Top 20 countries,” 2017). A total of 57,607,242 or 55.5 percent of the 103,796,832 Filipinos had online access. From 2000 to 2017, the number of Filipino netizens rose a staggering 2,780.4 percent. For most of them, the primary purpose for going online was to connect with family and friends (Garcia, Arizabal, & Tuazon, n.d.).
Although the Internet and new gadgets have made communication easier, these have not stopped people in LDRs—including OFWs—from having interpersonal conflicts. Conflicts are a part of life and cannot be avoided (Canary, 2003). Thus, it is not surprising that a cursory glance in the shelves of any major bookstore will yield several titles on how to handle conflicts. However, all these titles provide advice only for proximal couples; there is none for people in LDRs. The lack of resources for long-distance couples is true not only in the popular press, but in the academic literature as well.