I Want to Know What Love Is: The Ingredients of Liking, Attraction, Dating, and Successful Marital Relationships

Introduction

Astute theorists and relationship experts have asserted that love is an active, rather than a passive process. Love and relationships require constant work, communication, effort and persistence. Each aspect of relationships- from initial attraction and liking to online and offline dating and the successful maintenance of satisfying marital relationships demand attention, care and investment. This chapter will delve into the intricacies of liking, attraction, online dating, successful marriage and the roots of divorce to better explicate the rich, but complex development and maintenance of romantic relationships. More specifically, we will explore how familiarity, similarity, gender, short and long-term dating intentions, trustworthiness, positive partner attraction, dominance, attachment security and other factors pertain to attraction and liking. We will introduce the Cues Filtered out Theory, The Social Presence Theory, The Media Richness Theory, and will delineate the benefits and limitations of online dating as they relate to computer-mediated communication. We will then explore the ingredients of successful and unsuccessful marriages. We will learn of the importance of similarity, communication and equity and of the detriments of dissatisfaction and conflict in a marital relationship. Finally, we will examine how the Prepare/Enrich Program offers valuable advice for resolving conflicts, recognizing the strengths, and creating a financially stable and productive life with one’s partner.